The value of being yourself

Rosa Parks’s mugshot, 1955. Universal History Archive/UIG via Getty
I have learned over the years that when one’s mind is made up, this diminishes fear; knowing what must be done does away with fear. ~ Rosa Parks
There are times in life that you feel like it’s just not working for you anymore. You feel frustrated, annoyed, pissed off and often find yourself running around in circles.
How do you get things back on track?
The biggest issue I find is that my clients just don’t know what the hell they value in life. Some think they do, but every time we sit down and comb through their values they are always shocked.
What are values?
There the things you value the most, like freedom, adventure, love, stability, family, money, abundance, clarity, knowledge, education, honesty, connection etc. There are hundreds of these suckers and they help us understand what drives and motivates us.
Below is a list of over 400 values! Print them off and see if you can get to your top 10 values!
Ability Abundance Acceptance Accomplishment Achievement Acknowledgement Adaptability Adequacy Adventure Affection Affluence Alertness Aliveness Ambition Amusement Anticipation Appreciation Approachability Artfulness Assertiveness Assurance Attentiveness Attractiveness Availability Awareness Awe Balance Beauty Being-ness Belongingness |
Blissfulness Boldness Bravery Brilliance Calmness Camaraderie Capability Care Carefulness Certainty Challenge Charity Charm Chastity Cheerfulness Clarity Class Cleanliness Cleverness Closeness Comfort Commitment Compassion Competence Complacency Completion Composure Concentration Confidence Conformity |
Congruency Connection Consciousness Consistency Contentment Continuity Contribution Control Conviction Coolness Cooperation Correctness Courage Courtesy Craftiness Creativity Credibility Cunning Curiosity Daring Decisiveness Deepness Deference Delicacy Delight Dependability Depth Desire Determination Devotion |
Devoutness Dexterity Dignity Diligence Diplomacy Direction Directness Discernment Discretion Discipline Discovery Diversity Dreaming Drive Duty Eagerness Economy Ecstasy Education Effectiveness Efficiency Endurance Energy Enjoyment Enlightenment Entertainment Enthusiasm Exactness Excellence Excitement Exhilaration Expectancy Expediency Experience Expertise |
Exploration Expressiveness Extravagance Extroversion Exuberance Evolution Facilitating Fairness Faith Fame Fascination Fashion Fearlessness Femininity Fidelity Fineness Finesse Firmness Fitness Flexibility Flow Fluency Fluidity Focus Fortitude Frankness Freedom Friendliness Frugality Fun Gallantry Generosity Gentility Genuineness Giving |
Grace Gratefulness Gratitude Growth Guidance Happiness Harmony Health Heart Helpfulness Heroism Holiness Honesty Honour Hopefulness Hospitality Humility Humour Hygiene Imagination Impact Impartiality Impeccability Independence Industry Ingenuity Inquisitiveness Insightfulness Inspiration Instinctiveness Integrity Intelligence Intensity Intimacy |
Introversion Intuition Intuitiveness Inventiveness Joy Justice Keenness Kindness Knowledgeableness Lavishness Leadership Learning Liberation Liberty Liveliness Logic Longevity Love Loyalty Majesty Mastery Maturity Meekness Mellowness Meticulousness Mindfulness Moderation Modesty Motivation Mysteriousness Neatness Nerve Obedience Open-mindedness Openness |
Optimism Opulence Order Organization Originality Outlandishness Outrageousness Passion Peacefulness Perceptiveness Perfection Perseverance Persistence Persuasiveness Philanthropy Playfulness Pleasantness Pleasure Plentiful-ness Poise Polish Popularity Potency Practicality Pragmatism Precision Preparedness Presence Privacy Proactive Proficiency Professionalism Prosperity Prudence Punctuality |
Purity Qualification Quietness Quickness Realism Readiness Reason Recognition Recreation Refinement Reflection Relaxation Reliability Resilience Resolution Resolve Resourcefulness Respect Restfulness Restraint Reverence – respect for others Richness Rigor Sacredness Sacrifice Saintliness Satisfaction Security Self-control Selflessness Self-realization Self-reliance Sensitivity Sensuality |
Serenity Service Sexuality Sharing Shrewdness Significance Silence Silliness Simplicity Sincerity Skilfulness Smartness Sophistication Solidarity Solidity Solitude Soundness Speed Spirit Spirituality Spontaneity Stability Stillness Strength Structure Substantiality Success Sufficiency Support Supremacy Surprise Superbness Sympathy Synergy |
Tactfulness Teamwork Thankfulness Thoroughness Thoughtfulness Thrift Tidiness Timeliness Traditionalism Tranquillity Transcendence Trust Trustworthiness Truth Understanding Uniqueness Unity Usefulness Utility Valour Variety Victory Vigour Virtue Vision Vitality Warmth Watchfulness Wealth Wholesomeness Wilfulness Willingness Winning Wisdom |
Wittiness Wonder Worthiness Zest
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For my clients, the first step in breaking ‘the good girl rules’ is making your own damn rules. And here’s how you’re going to do that!
Step 1) Decide what your values are.
List 5 values and prioritise them from highest to lowest.
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Rank 1 – 10 |
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Step 2) Create rules for your lives that use these values as a standard.
If you value freedom and travel, then what rules are you going to create to take responsibility that freedom and travel become part of your life? Ask yourself “how do I know when I have freedom in my life?”. The answers will become your rules.
These rules are based on your own values, not on society’s or anybody else terms and conditions. Because of this, these rules will ensure that you stay connected to the values in life that bring you the most peace and happiness and feed your soul at the highest level.